Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
