Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
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