i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize