I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
