i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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