hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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