I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Your cock deserves a montage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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