I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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