He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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