TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
