Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize
