what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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