i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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