Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
