Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize