new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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