Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
