There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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