It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Randomize
