Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Randomize