All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
