Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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