i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
