I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I think a kid would responsible me up
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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