pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize