Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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