girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
