I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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