I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize
