so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
My vagina is officially offended.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
