How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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