oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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