As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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