His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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