I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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