Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
You're like the curious george of whores
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
you never un-have a 4some
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
