so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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