Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
im drinking this country out of the recession.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
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