Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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