i don't like sucking hair
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?