Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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