you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
