How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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