He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
