it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I am available for nakedness
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize