Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
So many bounce houses so little time
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
