you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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