Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
