all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
