He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
