I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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