I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
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Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
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Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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